


Pressing On My Heart

by TheMorbidHobo



Category: Video Blogging & YouTube RPF
Genre: #HashTag, #YOLOSWAG420BLAZEIT, #imabutt, #satire, F/M, Friendship, M/M, Romance, TotalCox, YouTube, dexbonus, polaris - Freeform, presshearttocontinue - Freeform, thegamestation
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2013-07-07
Updated: 2016-08-08
Packaged: 2017-12-17 22:45:03
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Underage
Chapters: 8
Words: 8,182
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/872814
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/TheMorbidHobo/pseuds/TheMorbidHobo
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>I very lengthy love story about a fan and Brooke Leigh Lawson, of PressHeartToContinue. Rated Explicit due to the occasional "sex" scene. Rated underage for general descriptions of/references to a 17 year old's genitals.</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. So It Begins...

**Author's Note:**

> None of the names/aliases of the main character are meant to model a being of real life. Any people/accounts associated with these names are not owned by me nor my comrades.

           It was just an average night. I was sprawled out in my bed, watching Youtube videos and laughing to myself while everyone else in my house slept soundly. I was a 17 year old boy who lived in a little town in Canada with both of my parents, and my sister. I was about average height, 5’11, and a little overweight, despite my rather large build. I never did very well in school, however that is not to say I was a bad student. I was kind and respectful to all of my teachers and peers, and never expected the same in return, mostly because it was almost never the case. Overtime I developed a rather coy nature as to not provoke extreme emotions out of anyone, despite this though; I was still able to make a few friends at school, all of them being decent people themselves. I also met a few people I considered acquaintances due to me still spending time with them, but more often than not, disliking the decisions they made. This was even truer with the girls I knew, so much so that the mere thought of most of them depressed me, which I’m sure was at least part of the reason for my current virginity. In fact, the closest contact I had ever had up until that point was a single hug from a girl back in elementary school. I had very limited interests; animation, Youtube, video games, and creative writing, thus I had no real large goals or aspirations for my life, that is, until something happened…

 

            One day, while browsing Youtube, I found a video with a thumbnail of some random girl with mostly auburn hair with exception to two symmetrical sections of white, which seemed to look like two fox tails on either side of her head, with the title of the video stating some weird miss-match of game titles. My first thoughts were a little sceptical, and rather judgemental, knowing that most of the “gamer girls” I knew had about as much experience with video games as they did quantum physics; that is to say, none. Despite this, I had nothing better to do with my time but watch it; at the very least I could laugh about the girl’s inexperience, right? To my surprise though, the girl from the thumbnail who referred to herself only as ‘Dodger’, really did know what she was talking about, and aside from some random tangents, she may actually had known more than me! Intrigued by this woman, I immediately went to her latest video, entitled “GAMING NEWS:…” and clicked on it. After learning about so many things that I was completely unaware of in the gaming industry, as well as getting a few laughs out of the girl’s fun-loving, ambitious and magnetizing nature, I instantly subscribed to both the channel where she posted her “GAMING NEWZ” videos, and her “COFFEH” channel which she mentioned in the show.

 

            After about four months or so, and well over 100 videos, I decided to maybe learn a bit more about this “Dodger” girl. So, I flew over to twitter, quickly made an account and ‘followed’ her, as well as a few other Youtubers I had an interest in, most of them being from The Game Station. Tweet after tweet came in about her day, whether it be some conversation she had, her talking about dyeing her hair, or even just “butts”. I read them, one after another, and even muster up the courage to occasionally reply to her, usually making what I thought was a funny remark. This continued for months and months, I eventually updated my profile to contain things like my Youtube channel, despite me never posting videos, my DeviantART account, where I ended up posting a few pictures I drew at one point or another, my Skype account name, and a little bio about me liking video games, sketching, animation etc. I also created a little alias for myself called The Infamous Toad.

 

            One day while I was sitting at my computer, writing a little story about nothing in particular, I got a little notification on Skype. Not reading what the little pop-up said, I just figured it was one of my friends wanting to chat. So, I opened up Skype and went to notifications, but instead of a message from a friend, I found something I wouldn’t have ever expected. In my little notification bar, there was a friend request from a user by the name of “PressHeartToContinue”, the same name Dodger uses as her “GAMING NEWZ” channel on Youtube. Slightly confused and a little anxious I asked who this person was. For many moments there was nothing, so I continued on with writing my short story, figuring it was just some sort of bot who would never reply to me, or rather have a one-sided conversation with me about how I should check out some website that just ends up giving me a virus. I waited about an hour or so, and just when I was about to shut down my computer for the night, a message came in.

 

“ **P <32C**\- Is this not The Infamous Toad?”

“ **TheToad** \- No, no. This is him.” I replied, trying to sound calm. “But who are you?”

“ **P <32C**\- You really can’t tell by my name? C’mon guy, thought you would’ve been smarter than that” I was a little taken back by this.

“ **TheToad** \- Well by your name you are Dodger… but…”

“ **P <32C**\- but..?”

“ **TheToad** \- I mean you couldn’t be… why in the world would you add me?” I replied in great confusion.

“ **P <32C**\- Why not?”

“ **TheToad** \- Great explanation, definitely convinces me. -_-”

“ **P <32C**\- lol okay, tbh I was reading your tweets at me and most of them made me laugh

 **P <32C**\- so I skimmed through your twitter profile and clicked on your deviant art page.”

“ **TheToad** \- and..?” I asked sheepishly, knowing that there was one, if not more pictures of Dodger on my page.

“ **P <32C**\- and I thought ‘hey, this guy’s pretty good!’

 **P <32C**\- since I didn’t see anything stalker-ie about you, I added you”

“ **TheToad** \- Oh… okay then… that’s… wow.”

“ **P <32C**- ???”

“ **TheToad** \- I’m still not convinced though.  :/

 **TheToad** \- You have to admit it’s kind of crazy to think that a person that has such a huge fan base would add me.”

“ **P <32C**\- I’ll prove it then”

            Suddenly I heard the little Skype sound, and a window popped up. A little shocked, I paused for a moment.

“ **P <32C**\- C’mon accept” The person sent.

            I hesitantly accepted the voice call and quickly muted my mic.

“Hello..?” The voice said a little hesitantly.

“ **TheToad** \- No mic.” I typed, blatantly lying.

“ **P <32C**\- I’m not coming through?” she wrote.

“ **TheToad** \- No, you’re fine, I mean I have no mic.” I explained.

“Oh okay then…” the voice said, giggling a bit.

“Well… you sound like you…”

“Is that enough proof then?”

“TheToad- say ‘pickled cabbage is gross’.” I typed sneering; knowing the real Dodger loves sauerkraut.

“Uh, no. Sauerkraut is delicious. I would never say that.” the voice said in an almost cocky tone.

“ **TheToad** \- okay. I believe you now.”

“Good.”

The call ended, and the person I believed to be Dodger continued to type.

“ **P <32C**\- Well, I’m going out to get food now, so I’ll talk to you later

 **P <32C**\- byebye! “

“ **TheToad** \- bye…” I typed just before she signed off.

 

            I sat there for hours just thinking, _“out of everyone she could have added, she chose me… incredible… just… incredible…”_.


	2. Restless Nights

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Well, the explicit content commences.

 

               I just sat there, paralyzed, as the thick, humid air around me coated my body in a slick of sweat. As my head began to droop down in sudden exhaust, I noticed the wet tiles below my feet, but more than that, I noticed what I was wearing, or rather, wasn’t; I had no pants, no shirt, no underwear no… anything. All that I had covering me was what seemed like a pure white cotton face cloth draped over my lap, barely covering my groin. I took a deep breath and gathered what little strength I had, just to turn my head to look around. A sink, a shower faucet, a bathtub, and tiles covering the entirety of the room, I was definitely in some sort of bathroom, but for how long? Considering my exhaustion I would say days, but I’m no doctor, so I don’t know. I looked towards the only opening in the room, a doorway, shrouded in complete darkness, only to see a figure of white, capped off by a flaming crown of red. The figure, short in stature with smaller legs and larger hips, stepped closer and closer as it became more defined, but never quite clear, that is, until it spoke. “I’ve been waiting for you…” Its voice was like liquid velvet licking my ear, so seductive, yet incredibly cute. It came closer and closer until the small statured women stood right in front of me. Its miniature hand reached out to me, lifting my chin up to meet with her eye to eye. From her little feet, to her B cup breasts, to the top of her head, I judged her about 5’0 tall, but once again I’m no doctor. Her soft sensual voice spoke once more, “I’ve waited far, far too long…” she opened her legs revealing her weeping lips and began to climb on top of my lap, “far, FAR too long…” She wrapped her arms gently around my neck and rested into a seated position on top of me. I felt the towel resting on me become tighter and tighter, rising higher and higher until I felt the tip of my member resting on a warm soaked crevasse. The girl’s head jolted back, as a little yelp escaped her lips. Still exhausted, my head fell forward into the girl’s chest, “no, no, no… not yet…” she giggled, straightening back up on the stool. She continued to snicker as she leaned in, her eyes closed as her lips met mine; soft as silk, so tender and luscious. She reached down and pushed the towel out of the way, immediately springing my glans into her wet slit. I could feel her body begin to shake as she started to moan. I felt her fingers crawl around my crown as she rubbed her slicked slit, stretching it open, allowing me to freely enter…

 

               I woke up in a heat, sweating from head to toe. I instinctively sat up as memories of my dreams began to flow into my mind. “How could I… I mean I just met her, and I didn’t really even do that…” I looked down, noticing my hardening member as the thoughts of the girl overflowed. I pushed it down between my legs as I rolled over and attempted to go back to sleep. “She doesn’t have those feelings for me… she doesn’t… and even if she did…”

 

               *MEEEP MEEEP MEEEP MEeep mee-- SMASH* I picked up my alarm clock, flinging it across the room, crushing it against the wall. I rolled over, falling out of bed right onto the floor with a loud *THUMP*as the back of my head smacked against the hardwood. Sitting up on my floor, I rubbed my scalp looking up dazed. “Guess I’m not going back to sleep now…” I grabbed a towel and continued to the shower, turning in to hot and stepping in. “Do I have feelings for her? Or was it just sexual” I asked myself as I washed, “all I know is that I need to talk to her again…”

               I was thinking about it the whole day, _“may be it wasn’t even her… just another short girl… with unnatural red hair… and the same body shape… and the same voice…”_ I stepped off the bus, saying goodbye to the driver as I started walking home. _“No… It was definitely her, no doubt about it. I just need to forget it, I’m contacting her tonight and I can’t be thinking of her supple, fair skin… and plump, luscious lips…”_ I shook as I unlocked my front door. I lunged inside, and ran directly to my room, where I immediately turn on the computer. _“C’mon… She’s just one girl… one beautiful… perfect… girl…”_ I slapped myself, knocking the visions of Dodger’s smiling face out of my mind. I quickly signed into Skype under my usual name, and threw my cursor over ‘PressHeartToContinue’… and paused. _“Okay… I’ll just wait… If she really wants to talk to me then she’ll--”_ but something cut me off.

“ **P <32C**\- Hello Mr. InfamousToad!” a message from a certain someone,

“ **TheToad** \- want to talk?” It felt as though my heart skipped a beat.

“ **P <32C**\- Oh, but you don’t have a mic… do you…

 **P <32C**\- Hmmmm…” I jumped at the question, knowing I truly did want to talk to her.

“ **TheToad** \- Actually I picked one up on the way home today.” _“Yeah, cause that’s not creepy at all, me!”_ I thought to myself as I facepalmed.

“ **P <32C**\- Great!” I read, followed immediately by a Skype call notification. I instantly clicked accept, and sat up in my chair, waiting for her greeting.


	3. Little incidents

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> In the first voice to voice call that our, for now nameless, protagonist and Dodger have, every thing that could have gone wrong did.

                The call window opened, but what was in it was not what I expected. Instead of just a voice, as was the case last time she called, there was also a webcam feed. Dodger sat there in her big black roly-poly chair, bringing her “KING BUTT-TOUCHES” coffee mug to her lips with one arm, and had her other arm sitting across her chest. Her makeup completely desolate from her face, her hair so knotted and tangled that not even a mouse could get in it, she had fairly large bags under her eyes, and she wore a loose, slightly stained tank top. Despite all this though, somehow, she still looked cute, beautifully cute in fact. Even the look of her in possibly her lowest day-to-day state, her look alone still made me smile. Not knowing whether or not she herself knew that the webcam was on, and me being entranced in her gaze, I failed to tell her that it was. Sitting up in her chair she began to speak in a rather joyful voice. “Hello Mr. Toad!” She said with excitement into her microphone, a smile gleaming about her face. I sunk into my chair as I began to speak in my usual, rather deep voice.

“Hello uh… Dodger,” I said awkwardly.

“Well you sound rather manly, macho, masculaaane!” She responded in a macho voice, most likely trying to loosen me up a little.

“I… I guess…” _’God! Why am I so awkward?!_ I asked myself, trying to think of something to say. “How have you been… er, uh… how’s your day been so far?” _’Quite obviously I am the Jesus of asking questions’._

“Pretty slow actually. I wound up staying awake until about 3 AM playing Persona 4. Totally worth though. And since I don’t have anything scheduled for today, I was able to sleep in until about 12 PM!” Dodger explained, placing her coffee mug on her desk. “I haven’t even been up for an hour now, so don’t get offended or something if I wind up ya—“ Cut off by the very thing she was explaining, Dodger stretched her arms over her head, slowly inhaled with a wide open mouth, then exhaled very quickly, letting her arms just flop down aside her, creating said yawn.

“Speak of the devil!” I joyfully chuckled with her for a few seconds before I noticed something and became dead quiet; Dodger’s nipples, hard as stone, almost carving into her shirt. It was silent for many moments as my face turned red and my pants tightened a little, I tried to continue our conversation as best as I could, “So uhhh… how’s the temp… er, uh… weather in California today? Hot and sunny I would assume.”

“Yeah, really hot outside actually, but its bone-chilling in here!” she exclaimed, putting her usual overly large amount of emphasis on ‘bone’. “My house mates seem to think that 65 is an appropriate temperature… Now 70, I can comfortably deal with, but 65 is just cold!”

“Looks like it.” I said, still a little zombified by Dodger’s erect nipples.

“Yeah really…”She said before contorting her face into what can only be described as total udder confusion. “Wait… ‘Looks like it’…? Can you… can you see me?”

“Well… uhhh…. Sort of…” I neglectfully responded. Dodger’s face went beat red, but, unexpectedly, not with anger like I have experienced so many times before, but rather, with embarrassment.

“And… uh… how could you tell it was… cold?” Dodger asked looking up into the webcam, her bosom nearly falling out of her top.

“Well you’re uh… chest… is well…” I said carefully as not to anger. Dodger instantly looked down towards her chest in despair.

                “I’ll just uh… maybe I’ll talk to you later.” She murmured, scurrying to cover her breasts with one arm, and click out of Skype with the other. “Stupid Skype! EXIT ALREADY!!!” She yelled angrily at the computer as she stood up to simply turn off the webcam; and that’s when it happened. I suppose her shirt was stretched out or something from her sleeping in it, or maybe it was just a really oversized shirt, I don’t know, but what I do know is that as soon as Dodger stood up to turn off the webcam, somehow, both of the straps of her tank top, dropped down to her elbows revealing to me something I thought I, and I’m sure many other have thought I would never see. As the straps dropped to her elbows, the rest of her top went down with it, revealing two small but oh-so-soft looking breasts, colored fair, each of them topped with 1, still rock hard, maybe even harder now, nipple. My jaw dropped and I began babbling like porky the pig, but without anything to actually say. As she reached toward the webcam obviously unaware of her "assets" release, it only became worse. The low collar of the tank top became anchored on her teats, causing the shirt to not only push up, but press together Dodger’s perfect little bust in an indescribably sensual fashion, enough to make any man’s mouth salivate uncontrollably, and become hard as tampered steel. Just as quick as it started it was over. Her webcam was off and I knew what was coming next, but before she was able to calm herself enough to end the call, or ream my ass out for not saying anything in the first place, I was able to make out a simple statement that I felt needed to be said before she could do anything. “Y-you’re b-b-b… er… chest Dodger…” And the Skype call ended.


	4. Mutual Tears

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> After many long days and nights of sorrow, our now protagonist finally introduces himself.

                I went to sleep with bitter-sweet thoughts that night. Yes, I was finally seeing a girl’s breasts relatively privately, but at the same time, I was worried about how my relationship with Dodger would go, or if it would just completely stop after today’s events. But more then that I was worried about whether Dodger even felt safe on the internet at all anymore, if she was now emotionally scarred thinking that her body, her REAL body was now all over the internet for everyone to ogle.

 

                Over the next few days I heard nothing from her, and I was beginning to think that the relationship with my dream girl, however insignificant, was now over. I continued my day-to-day life: questioning my sanity and livelihood at every turn; I no longer had anything to smile at, maybe I could get a laugh or two out of Jesse Cox’ or Crendor’s videos, but I never felt genuinely happy anymore. With the absence of Dodger talking to me, with the absence of her in my life; I felt alone.

 

                I was at home one night of the weekend, it was sometime around 6:00, maybe 7:00, just after watch that week’s podcast which was postponed that week due to unforeseen circumstances. Dodger was on it, just the same as every week, but she didn’t seem to be quite her usual, overly-happy self, almost like her mind was on other things the entire time. It disturbed me, or more accurately depressed me. Anyways, I was just sketching at an old picture of some sort, probably a ninja or something, on my drawing tablet when a skype call came in. Feeling overly sad for a boy my age, I instantly clicked decline without at all looking, or really care about who was calling. Then a message came in; once again I ignored it. Then another message, and another and another, until I couldn’t take the little skype message sound anymore. I gave up and opened the chat, to tell whoever was continuously messaging me to let me stay as the wet hump of thatch I was and always would be.

 

“ **P <32C**\- …” My eye widened as I read the name of the sender, and continued to read message after message that she sent.

“ **P <32C**\- Please…

 **P <32C**\- we really need to talk

 **P <32C**\- just call me

 **P <32C**\- I really need to know something”.

 

                I hesitantly made the call not quite actually knowing what she would question me about; but I had it under good confidence that it was about THAT day. The call went through, and I began to hear the faint sound of an AC unit breezing in the background.

 

“Hey… So…” Dodger mumbled to me wearily.

“S-so…”

“So, what… What exactly did you see… that… time?” she asked, obviously very embarrassed about the situation.

I tried acting a little dumb to it, pushing it off as nothing. “W-what time?”

“You know what time. Don’t act s-stupid…” This time she sounded even less confident about herself, almost… scared?

“I… I’ll be honest with you… I saw a lot... I... saw it all.” I completely expected the call to end right then and there, loosing what little chance I had with this girl… but instead a response came through.

“You can’t tell anyone. You can’t share this, you can’t talk about this ever; or… or… I-I don’t know…” I could hear her start to choke up “Just please, no one can know about this, the rule34 is bad enough, but to have my actual body out there… It would ruin me.” I wasn’t sure, but from the sniffling it sounded as though she began weeping. “Not even just my job, but my actual life… Please…”

“D-don’t cry… I-I won’t share this with anyone…. This will just be between you... you and me…” I started to tear up myself, thinking about someone who I felt so dearly for cry because of something I may not have done, but I was involved in. I wiped my eyes and cleared my throat to give a concise answer, “Forever between us; our little secret.”

I could still hear her snorting a little, but she was able manage a reply: “Thank you… so much… You don’t know how much this means to me. I’ve spent days awake since then…”

“I could tell by the podcast… hehehe…” I said, trying to bring some light to the conversation.

“Hehe… It was that obvious, huh?” She replied, chuckling a little.

“It was like you were a zombie. I think at one point you even said ‘Urrrggg brains…’.”

“ ‘Nouther quote for Out of Context Dodger then I guess!”

 

                We continued talking for a few more moments until the laughter quieted down.

 

“Hehe… Well, I guess I should formally introduce myself then” Dodger stated, in a now cheerful tone. “My real name’s Brooke, Brooke Lawson.” She said in a sort of 007 mannerism.

“I’m Adriel, Adriel Henry” I said, mimicking her.

“Well, Mr. Henry! I have some editing to do, and I need to early get up tomorrow, so good night fine prince!” she announced in a rather sarcastic tone.

“And you as well m’lady!”

“Remember, I trust you.” She said in a serious tone, pausing, only to break into laughter a few seconds later. “Alright then, see you later!” The call ended; and unlike any one of the calls before, I felt truly happy after this one; with the feeling that maybe this would end up going somewhere, and more importantly, I was now sure that I would talk to her again. Sometime soon perhaps.


	5. Coffee house... blues?

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Another night, but this time, it's a little less blue and a little more... well... happy.

           I just sat there, paralyzed, as the thick, humid air around me coated my body in a slick of sweat. I had felt this before; it was very familiar in fact, only… very different. My head easily swayed up as the boiling sun beat down on my face, I wasn’t nearly as paralyzed as I originally thought. I quickly looked down to notice I, thankfully, was fully dressed in a t-shirt, pants, sandals, and despite me not seeing them, boxers. All around me was grass, and surrounding that, pavement. I was not in a bathroom, not naked… but, one thing was the same. A figure, a drak figure this time, shaded out by the sun’s rays. As my eyes began to adjust, I noticed the figure coming closer, just to stop right in front of me, and seemingly look down towards me. My pupils fully dilated as the figure began to speak… or laugh?

           “Ha ha ha ha! What are you doing sitting on the ground you big oomph?” The voice was mocking, but it somehow made me incredibly happy. Unlike last time, the figure sharpened, and became completely clear to me.

           “Brooke… I…” An innocent smile formed, as Brooke moved her hand closer, gesturing me to grab a-hold.

           “Can’t be sitting in the sun all day now, c’mon inside, it’s about time for coffeh!” She explained, with a very excited look about her.

           I slowly reached for the hand, only for it to be quickly grabbed up. “C’mon you lazy butt!” Brooke voiced sarcastically, tugging at me to get up. I slowly began to stand, as she continued to pull on my arm. Up straight, I must have been at least a foot taller than the girl, the top of her head sitting at around the bottom of my shoulders. Her posture was a little off, having her butt stick out when standing in a comfortable position, actually, much like my own; however she didn’t have quite as much of a hunch as I did around my shoulder area. She wore sort of cargo short shorts, a light blue tank top, and black high heels, or rather, short heels due to then only being about an inch or so tall.

           Moving her hand around mine, she pressed he digits between mines, weaving out fingers together. Brooke smiled up at me, blushing slightly, but still looking very much happy, and from the growing warmth on my face, I could feel I was blushing too. Well that or burning from the blisteringly hot sun. Now gently holding my hand, Brooke led me to her house; it wasn’t anything too fancy, just white on white on beige on grey on white. We walked to the kitchen where there was a hot pot of coffee, freshly brewed and waiting. She took two of her over-the-top mugs out of the cabinet, and placed them on the counter. She poured the coffee in the mug in front of her, a brown one with the phrase ‘Coffee makes me poop’ labelled across the side. She began adding ingredients to it: sugar, sugar, sugar… sugar… uh… sugar… “Go head, grab some.” She uttered in an assuring voice; pouring more and more sugar into her cup, all whist still firmly holding my hand.

           With my free extremity, I grabbed the coffee pot and poured a little in the ‘KING BUTT-TOUCHES’ mug Brooke pulled out for me. I took a sip, “Bitter…” I mumbled with a little bit of disgusted face. I filled the mug about 1/3 with cool water and filled the rest with the remaining coffee. “Much better…” I sighed, taking a slurp of my now slightly cooled, weaker beverage. Brooke looked up at me in confusion, shaking her head a little and smiling sheepishly. She stood up on the toes, stretching out her body as she leaned her lips in towards me, giving me a little peck on my stubble covered cheek. I looked down at her, surprised by the kiss, but before I could ask her anything, she marched down the hall, mug in hand, dragging me along. I followed aimlessly as we finally came to a white door near the end of the hall. She looked back, smiling up at me as she turned the door knob and pushed open the aperture.

           There is was: Brooke’s room, exactly as I remembered it. Walls covered in posters, a twin, maybe even queen sized bed, resting in the corner, covered in a random assortment of clothes and other oddities. As we entered, we were welcomed by a faintly familiar ‘meow’, as I began to feel something rub up against my leg. “Daaaaw… Sherlock, did you make a new friend?” I smiled as I saw a rather large black fur ball, rubbing up against my leg, who I instantly knew was Brooke’s cat, Sherlock. I placed my mug on top of the dark wood dresser that sat under the only window in the room, and kneeled down to pet the fuzzy little guy. Sherlock turned around and began licking my fingers, with the ever so often ‘meow’ mixed in. I rubbed its belly a little and stood back up, making sure to grab my coffee mug before both me and Brooke sat down, letting go of each other’s hand as she placed her mug on her desk and scurried up to her keyboard. “Okay, get out of shot for a second until I introduce you.” She told be with a modest grin. I rolled the chair and me out of frame, and just as the last bit of me left, Brooke hit record.

           “HEY GUYS! It’s coffeh time” She announced, using her normal intro, and taking a sip of her now warm coffee. “And today we have a special guest that…. I’m almost sure none of you will know! So without further ado, it is my great honor to welcome Adriel!” She moved a little out of the way, gesturing me for my entrance. As I rolled up towards the camera, everything began to fade out into white until…

           I woke up slowly, yawning and stretching as the morning sun gleamed through my window. “Oh… Brooke…” I murmured to myself, smiling all the while. “I yearn to talk to you, to hear your voice speak only to me…” And we did. At first once or twice a week, then every few days, then almost every day; talking and talking about our days, our lives growing up everything, she made me happy, she made my life worth living, every minute of agony I would go through, but it would all be worth it, just to hear her voice, the voice of a goddess, the voice of my, no, the perfect woman.


	6. A Change of Plans

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Short chapter. Adriel gets surprised when he is asked something out of the blue.

     The days went on; long and boring as always, nothing really changed that much. I did feel happier throughout the day now though, despite the consistent expression of distain plastered across my face. My grades did suffer somewhat from my new interest, if not only by a few percent; nothing that would exile my chances of going to the collage of my choice or anything. As the conversations between Brooke and I became longer and more in-depth, I slowly stopped watching her _Coffeh Time_ videos; I saw her face almost every day for at least half an hour, not including the many hours a day we played video games together. It didn't really feel like we were getting any closer at this point, but we certainly were not growing apart. The thought passed my mind that I may have fallen into the "friend zone", but the concept was completely foreign to me, so I could never really tell. I honestly should have just been grateful at that point. This woman, my dream woman, was talking to me on a daily basis. Even if we were just friends, and destined to be so for the rest of our existence, it was still a connection, a relationship. Little did I know how far this relationship was really going to go.

     "What? Really?" I questioned the screen in a rather excited tone.

     "Yeppers! BlizzCon's coming up so I thought, there's no better time!" Brooke answered, sounding almost cocky that she came up with this whole scheme.

     "I can't let you pay for the whole thing though... There's the passes for the convention, the flight tickets there and back." I ranted in concern, "Not to mention I would need a place to stay and food to ea--" Brooke cut me off with a childish chuckle.

     "Done and done. The pass is already bought and the plane tickets are on hold."

     "What about a place to stay? I won't be able to book anything even close to Los Angeles, especially with BlizzCon not even a week away." I argued coyly, for whatever reason desperate to find some circumstance so that I did not have to go.

     "Uh dur. You'd stay with me, obviously. Unless… is that a problem?" She inquired, her voice seeming almost hurt by the question.

     I became a little overwhelmed by the thought. Me and Brooke... under the same roof... for an entire week... My cheeks burned at the thought. But Brooke was looking for an answer, and I had no right to deny her one. "Well I would have to check with my parents, but I guess if you're coving it, it should be alright..." I managed to utter. Maybe things were going somewhere; maybe we were getting closer...

     "Great! Just get back to me by tomorrow so I can confirm the flight for this weekend. Good bye, ya butt!" Brooke bid adieu, leaving me with the sound of what I can only assume to be a kiss and a giggle. The Skype call ended. I leaned back in my leather-clad desk chair, basking in the glory of my current situation. Despite the nauseating feeling in the pit of my stomach that I can only assume was caused by nervousness, I felt an overwhelming sense of... happiness, satisfaction maybe? I'm not really sure how else to describe it. 


	7. Initial Encounters

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> I wrote a description, but it got deleted. He meets her, basically.

     I sat at the airport. The artificial lighting of the building gleamed in the shadow of the midnight air. The place was nearly empty, just a few people scattered about, for whatever reason, all wearing suits; I felt very much in place, despite the obvious price difference in our clothing. I wore black jeans, a collared shirt, a crimson tie, and my dress shoes; the typical attire for me. However, with it being winter, and with me not owning anywhere close to a warm enough blazer, I was forced to wear my giant black down coat; which, while comfortable, wasn’t exactly a fashion statement (or at least wasn’t a good one). I was accompanied by a lone carry-on: a small suitcase stuffed to the brim with "necessities": four changes of clothes, soap, shampoo, my toothbrush and of course, my half-broken piece-of-shit laptop.

     I would have thought my family would have put up more of a fight for me when I initially asked them; I mean I was flying across the country to live with a person they have never met before for almost a week. In their defence, they were sceptical at first, but as soon as they heard the trip was all-expense-paid they couldn't get me out of the house fast enough.

     My plane docked and I went through security without a hitch. The flight to California was rather boring, which was unexpected, this being my first time on a plane. All the horror tales about babies crying, and old fat men snoring like gorillas, happily, did not come to fruition. I ended up sleeping most of the way there, waking up only once to some happy-looking kid, maybe a year or so younger than me, tripping into my lap. He swiftly apologized, and stumbled away; a menacing grin plastered across his face. I thought nothing of it at the time, and casually fell back to sleep.

     The sound of an old-fashioned _ding-dong_ rang through the air, followed by a barely audible voice. "The plane has now docked. Please gather your belongings and proceed to the back exit of the plane." I peeled my eyes open to see a flight attendant staring at with possibly the creepiest passive-aggressive sneer I have ever had the displeasure of experiencing.

     "Excuse me, sir. You need to exit the flight." The frail young woman stated murderously as I woke with a start. "Or at the very least let the other passengers through."

     "Oh! Sorry..." I yelled a little too loudly, jumping to my feet, immediately smacking the top of my head against the storage area above.

     "It's alright... sir" The girl shuddered, holding in a laugh, "But if you could please... take your carry-on items, and exit the flight." I nodded subconsciously in agreement, taking my luggage out of the over-head compartment and cleaning up my seating area, muttering apologes every so often. With my arms full, I gave the flight attendant a sorrowing smile and a bow, for whatever reason, and exited the flight as instructed.

     Stepping out into the airport, white noise began to fill the air; thousands of barely audible whispers, coming together to create an ear-wrenching uproar. Getting a few weird looks, I took off my parka-sized coat fit for a brutish winter in the Great White North, revealing my dress shirt and tie. "I suppose it isn't exactly cold here, so no need for this." I murmured, haphazardly stuffing my coat into my still open bag, and pulling out a small sheet of paper reading:

_1:30_ _PM - RED GREMLIN_

     I glanced down at my watch, making sure I was on time. "Where is she...?" I asked myself. "Is she not--" I was suddenly cut off by the sound of squealing metal, followed by the continuously growing noise of what seemed like a lactose-intolerant binge-eater, alone in an ice cream factory. A well-aged maroon sedan, outlined with dusty-brown rust pulled up in front of the airport entrance. The rumbling flatulent sound soon came to a halt as the door to the death machine quickly popped opened. Out she stepped, just barely tall enough to see the top of her head over the car, but from just that I could tell it was her. Her blazing red hair swayed in the breeze as she trounced around her old beater, a sign clearly stating “Welcome Adriel!” in hand. I froze for a moment, taking in my first sight of her: two sizes too large sun bleached blue jeans, black Converse shoes, and her green hoodie labelled with the simple phrase “DICKBUTTS”. It made my heart numb, thinking that she, the only girl I had ever had feelings for was standing in front of me, even if she didn’t know it.

     She stopped in front of her rust bucket, surveying the area as her hips gently floated from side to side. _”Okay Adriel, this is it. The moment you’ve been waiting for. Just, don’t screw it up!”_ I cleared my throat, put on a smile, and slowly made my way up to her.

     “Ummm… Brooke?” I asked in a voice-crackingly sheepish tone. She stopped her swaying and looked up at me with a coy smile. I pointed down at the sign, and then back up at me, “I’m William, nice to finally meet you!” I announced with a grin, holding out my hand for a more formal greeting. No words were said; she simply stood there, looking up at my dumb, gentle smile. I slowly withdrew my hand, figuring the time had passed, and brought it up to my head scratching it in awkward silence. _“What’s wrong? Oh god, she doesn’t like me, does she?! Is my hair out of place? Does my breath smell or something?!”_ Brooke’s head slumped down, as snivelling began to fill the air. Was she… crying? Droplets of water hitting the cement below confirmed my ominous suspicions. _“Oh god, she’s crying! She doesn’t just dislike me, she hates me! Why did I have to come here?! Why didn’t I just stay at ho--”_ The sound of cardboard hit the ground. A sudden warmth encapsulated me. This wasn’t normal warmth though, not from the sun at least. No, this was… body heat. I looked down at the girl clamped onto my body, tears still flowing down her cheeks. Between her sniffles and snorts the girl managed to udder a few audible words.

     “You’re… normal… Not… a weirdo… I’m so… happy…” I didn’t know how to react. My hands hovered over her body, not sure whether I should hug back. _“I’m… normal?”_ I questioned myself, _“Is that why she’s crying? She didn’t think I was… normal?!”_ My confusion finally broke as I let my hands fall to faintly rest against the warmth of Brooke’s sun kissed skin. She pulled away slightly, looking up at me with her glassy, cerulean-blue eyes and an almost worshipful smile of sheer happiness.

     “I’m sorry…” She whimpered, pulling herself in close again, “It’s just… you’re just… You’re not a freak!”

     She held me close, pressing ever part of her being against me. That’s when I felt it, or rather… them. Two brilliantly sort areas of tissue pushed against my stomach. _“Just ignore them… just ignore them… They’re just breasts…”_ she came in closer, _“cute… soft… squishy…”_ I could feel her little nipples pushing in against me, _“delicious… b-breasts…”_ My pants began to tighten, and I knew, as close as we were right then, in another moment she would most certainly feel something. I acted quickly, pushing her away somewhat.

     “O-of course I’m not a freak!” I said laughing awkwardly, “Now let’s skedaddle, time’s a-wasting!” Brooke gave me a happy nod as she ran to her crap cruiser, gesturing me to follow, “C’mon Adriel! We got a lot to do and little time to do it!" I managed to stumble my way over and get in. _“One week… 7 days… 168 hours…A lot of time, and I plan on spending every minute of it with her.”_ Little did I know how long this “trip” was really going to be.


	8. Realisation

But then I woke up.

My bleary eyes slinked open as the sun gleamed in my bedroom window; it was morning. I was in my parent’s house, my house, where I’d always been, not in the US, not in California, not with Brooke; I was alone. I am alone. I laid there, thinking of my dreams, my fantasies, my stories… They were all for not; none of it would ever happen, and I knew it. I turned my head, looking to my wall. A pencil sketch hanging there. It was her, it was for her. I thought back to my fanaticism, trying every which way to get my pencil sketch to her online, until finally, she received it, and what more, she featured it on her very show. It was years past, but it felt like only days. A small smile grew on my face, but quickly withered back away. She’s engaged, hell, she could be married… and to him… I grimaced. I didn’t know the guy, and I still don’t, but what I do know is his appearance. He wasn’t ugly, he wasn’t fat, he wasn’t even average. He was ruggedly handsome: well over 6 feet tall, a thin-muscular body, and a simply gorgeous face; it made me nauseous just thinking about it. But it wasn’t him… it was me… my hopelessness. I loved her, and I don’t use that term lightly. An overweight, anti-social, “nice-guy”, everyone’s second best friend, a jack of all trades but master of none, loved the most beautiful, smart, funny girl in the world, as far as I’m concerned. I don’t know what I expected. 

When I thought of her, I was happy. She made me happy, just hearing her, seeing her; it wasn’t enough. I wanted to meet her, introduce myself, and try my awkward hand at a real relationship. I was willing to do it; drive, fly, walk all the way there, if I had to. I just wanted to see if I had a droplet’s chance in hell of… anything, really. Then she found him. It had to be him. To see him, the former male-model, the socialite, the loudmouth with her… it crushed me. I thought that maybe, just maybe, if I was willing to travel 2000 miles, then I, the overweight anti-social “nice-guy” might have a chance with her, with Brooke… but no, it was a pipedream to begin with. Why would I think such a beautiful, smart, funny girl would EVER go for someone like me? Why would any beautiful, smart, funny girl go for someone like me? Why would any girl, even average, go for someone like me… I was nothing… I am nothing… 

I was empty for a long time after that, the few people that knew of my feelings towards Brooke I lied to, I said I was over her, that she wasn’t worth it. I wasn’t just lying to my friends though, I was lying to myself. I didn’t want to face it, that she, the reason I got up in the morning, would choose an obnoxious, loudmouth idiot over a guy like me; not me, obviously she’s never met me, but a guy like me… Jesse, Crendor, hell, I don’t know, fucking Lewis. It killed me inside. I stopped following her, watching her videos; I cut her out of my life. It felt terrible, like I took a part of me, the only happy part of me, the part that felt joy when I could hear her, see her, and I severed it.  


I sat up. I felt weighed down, like at any moment I could cry…. But nothing. I had nothing left. 

I jumped into college as soon as I could, feinting interest in whatever course would accept me; my grades had plummeted since… well… so my choices were limited. I hoped that it would make everything better, that it would help me forget about her, but it only got worse. Now away from home, away from the little stability, the little support, I had left in life, I fell. I had no one, and knew I never would. I started skipping class; something I had never done, even in my later high school years. I slept, sometimes for days on end, and I ate: a steady diet of soup and sawdust. Work kept on piling, assignments coming due, some that I never even touched; one class I stopped going to all together. I found myself wandering the institute, aimlessly looking around thinking someone might approach me, might talk to me, and not want to stop, wishing I had someone… I needed someone… The semester passed, and much to my parents’ dismay, I dropped out. In 4 months I managed to accumulate almost 10k in debt, and had nothing to show for it; I was back home, broke, and in a worse state of mind than when I left. Then she announced it. She was engaged.

I stood, the sun gleaming off my pasty complexion. I headed to my computer, my body wobbling with each step; I was done. It was time to end it. I sat down and turned it on. I opened my web browser, and searched for a website: “Archive of Our Own”. I used to post my stories on there, one in particular. People loved it, they couldn’t stop giving me “kudos”, and commenting, asking, telling me to write more. But I couldn’t. Out of respect? I’m sure it had something to do with it, but it was more for my own sanity, my own safety. I couldn’t think of her. I had to stop thinking of her. It only hurt me. I only hurt me. But today was the end, I had nothing to lose. I wrote, not from the mind, not some schoolboy fantasy, no, I wrote from the heart, from the emptiness I felt. From the emotions that crippled me for the past 2 and a half years of my life. I poured my soul into every word, and when I was done, I posted it: the ending of my fabled story that caught so much attention. It was not happy, it was not pleasing, a normal person might even cringe at my words, but it was real.

I shut down my computer, sighing and leaning back into my chair. It was over, and now there was only one thing left to do.  


Goodbye, world.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> For those of you who may ask, no, this is not a suicide note, nor am I going to kill myself. I just wanted to finish this story, and I think this is the only true ending, the only real ending. I'm sorry if I disappointed anyone.


End file.
